Sunday, October 28, 2012

The Foolproof Coffeemaker (Isn't)

Coffee, one of man's greatest discoveries.  I have had a cup of Joe every morning before heading to work for many years now, but a few months ago I decided to take my coffee habit into the office with a small coffee making device.  Using only this piece of plastic, which holds the filter, plus of course a filter and coffee grounds, hot water and gravity, I can make one cup of caffeinated bliss.  Of course, this low-tech solution soon brought me the derision of some coworkers, but I stood by its utility.  Eventually, though, even I had to admit that it was not as classy as the more well-known one cup coffee system.  Unfortunately, I don't rate having a secretary (the original one cup of coffee system), but I can afford a Keurig, so I went with that upgrade for my desk.

For those of you not familiar with this particular technological marvel, you simply open a hatch, put in a "k-cup" (pre-measured with coffee, sealed until use, and ridiculously expensive per serving compared to just buying grounds and filters) and hit a button.  A minute later, you have a cup of coffee   Unless you forgot to put your mug under the spout, then you have a wet, messy, albeit delicious smelling desk.

For those of us that are cheap, there is another option called "my k-cup".  it is a plastic device that holds a small reusable filter, allowing you to fill it with coffee grounds yourself.  The entire thing has a screw on lid, which you attach prior to placing it in the Keurig where the k-cup goes.  Of course, this thing is bigger than a k-cup so you have to remove another plastic piece that normally holds the k-cup in place.  Before you use another k-cup you must replace this piece, or else the k-cup will sit in the coffee maker, but the water will not properly pass through the k-cup, but will instead end up squirting all over the coffee maker.

I know this, because I made that mistake last week.  I'm sure my boss and coworkers were all amused listening to my reaction when I turned around from the whiteboard where I had been working , expecting to find a fresh cup of coffee, but instead finding a big mess.  It went something like this "What the....(opening lid to see if there is any indication what went wrong, realizing I didn't put the k-cup holder back in) AAAARGH!!!  I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!  I bring in some cream from home, and instead of making some delicious coffee I forget to put the piece in?!  You've got to be kidding me!!!"  I quickly calmed down, and made myself a cup of coffee the right way once I had cleaned up my mess.

Needless to say, later on when one of the guys I work with made a mistake with the copy machine he got a bit distraught, then told me he had "pulled a Morrell".  "What did you do?" I asked, assuming he would relate what mistake he had made.  "Something stupid" he said.  "Oh, wait, I didn't mean it that way".  I let him know that I knew what he meant, and hadn't taken it the wrong way, although I appreciated him putting 2 and 2 together for me, as I hadn't made the connection between the obvious secondary meaning and what he was really trying to convey.  Hopefully my name doesn't become associated with making laughable errors in the workplace.  If so, I wonder if I can get that copyrighted.  Let me make some coffee and think on that one a while...